Lost love
by OdestaAndClato
Summary: A story of Gloss's life before (and after) his games.
1. Chapter 1

Gloss, the tall man with the big muscles who managed to win The Hunger Games at the age of 16, by brutally forcing the people I wanted to be my allies and then backstabbing them. The public and media in District 1 and the rest of Panem only thinks of the first part, though. Tee part of me winning. They treat me like some hero sent from the gods, as if I could cure all the worlds diseases, and so on. Why? I killed 6 people by myself, and I could easily do the same to someone else, even if I'm not in the games any more. How can people even want to come near me?

I won the games last year, and my sister Cashmere won this year, so President Snow made us go together on her Victory Tour, even if I wasn't her mentor. He's a bitter, old little piece of shit, but what can you do? He fucking runs Panem. We just left the big Capitol party, and we're on our way back to District 1, for the final part of the tour. I've been sitting in my room for almost three hours, just looking at the old-fashioned interior and thinking about my parents. My mom died three years ago, from cancer. My dad is a famous jeweller. Mom refused to see a doctor and get a cure, because she didn't believe in the system we have. My dad was so frustrated and angry about it. He believed - and still does - in the system. The few times he talks about her now, he calls her weak and says she's a traitor. But I've seen him hold moms picture to his chest and cry, many times.

My dad works as a jeweller. That's what I wanted to be, until one day, when a 'talent scout' showed up at our door and said to my dad: "Your kids would make good tributes. I want them in my training centre". Mom was devastated, but dad didn't even object. He loves the games, and always thought - or 'knew' as he says - that if any of his kids was in it, we'd win.

Suddenly, the door to my cart opens, and I turn my head to see what's going on. It's just Cashmere. "Hey bro." she says, and sits down. "What's up?"

"Nothing much. Thinking." I say and look at her.

"You? Thinking? No. You gotta be kidding me!" she says sarcastically and starts laughing.

"Oh, haha. Yeah, so funny."

She keeps laughing until she hits my arm and says "What were you thinking about?"

"Mom and dad. And before that, I was thinking about her."

I look down as I say 'her'.

"Come on, Gloss. You wanna get over Daria, right?"

I keep staring down at the floor. "No. But I gotta... We're dangerous people now, sis."

"I don't think we are...? Snow likes us. We're not a threat to him, and he knows we won't ever be. She'll be safe. I don't get why you broke up with her. You broke her heart too. Ugh... I just don't get why you're being so stupid."

I look up at her again. "Because I keep having these... dreams. Nightmares. I wake up and scream, in the middle of the night."

Cashmere doesn't say anything, so I start talking again.

"Sometimes, I wake up in the middle of the night, screaming. I'm not a broken soul, but some things still scares me. Things from the arena. I'm not afraid of her getting hurt by Snow, I know he likes us, but I'm scared she'll be afraid of me. That she'll leave me, because she thinks I'm a monster."

Cashmere stands up. "Oh, Gloss... I feel sorry for men like you, who doesn't even understand themselves." she says and sighs, before she walks out the door again.

Cashmere and Daria - my ex, if you didn't already get that - are best friends.

I still remember Daria – all too – well. She's short and skinny, with long, light brown hair and grey eyes. She always looked so fragile, like you had to be careful about everything you did and said around her. One night, when Cashmere got called into the training centre late at night, Daria was supposed to come over. She was scared of me... really scared. Cashmere has muscles, yes, but me, I look like a gigant. And it looks even worse compared to Daria, who doesn't seem to have a single muscle what so ever.

So, the doorbell rang, I opened and she looked down to the ground at once, and asked me if Cashmere was inside. I told her she got called to the centre and would be back later.

Daria turned around and started walking back home, but my dad stuck his head out of the door and asked her if she didn't wanna stay here and wait for Cashmere inside. She was too polite to say no. We sat in the living room, first all three, then my dad left so it was just me and her. It took me a while to realize that I was staring at her. I kept thinking to myself "What would happen if I suddenly screamed or jumped at her. Would she do anything, or just start crying?" I was in a... training mode, I guess you could say. But suddenly, she looked up at me and - I don't think she meant to do it but - we made eye contact. She has the prettiest eyes I've ever seen...

It took a few days before I realized that I couldn't stop thinking about her. I woke up thinking about her, and fell asleep thinking about her. A few days later, Cashmere got called in late again, and Daria came over, thinking Cashmere was home.

Everything is mostly a blur – pretty sure it's because I was staring at her – until we kissed.

Suddenly the door opens again, and an avox servant enters, breaking the memory playing in my head off. She puts some towels down and exits, leaving me to my lonely self again.


	2. Chapter 2

It's been 3 days since the last part of the victory tour, the party in District 1. I'm laying in my room, just looking up at the ceiling. Dad is making a family dinner – he's invited all our relatives and old neighbours – to celebrate that we're home, and that he's the first parent ever to have two kids win the games. He was so proud when he saw Cashmere on the screen, standing over the body of her last opponent, looking extremely proud.

I get up from my bed and go down towards the kitchen. I look at the people here. Our house is pretty much full now.

I walk into the kitchen and find Cashmere, standing over a bowl of gravy. "Is Daria coming? You know, since it's your party, and all..." I say.

"You know she doesn't like to be around too many people at one time." she says, looking down. Suddenly I notice she's got tears in her eyes.

"What's wrong?"

"Nothing." she snaps quickly.

I roll my eyes and sigh. I am her big brother after all. "Cashmere... what's going on?" I say slowly.

"I said it's nothing. Okay? Just some douche bag."

"And who is the douche bag then?"

Okay, Cashmere is known as a classic beauty, but she's always been sensible with guys. So when she's mad at a guy – that isn't me or dad – you can be sure its bad. "Nickolas." she says, almost whispering and looks down.

I spread my eyes wide open. "Your... personal trainer?" I say and clear my throat. I never liked the guy – he's a previous victor, and he's about 8 or 10 years older than Cashmere – but I never really bothered to think about him until now. "Why...? Why the hell would you even do anything with that guy?!" I say, not realizing how mad I sound until after I've said it.

She looks at me. "He's not that bad... Actually a really nice person. It's just... he's got some strong opinions, about the way Snow runs Panem. So Snow is making him do... well... different things. And it was fine for a while, or as fine as it could be I guess, but now he suddenly won't talk to me."

I sigh again, but just as I'm about to say something, dad sticks his head in between us. "The food is ready! We're going to eat now. So come and sit down now, okay?"

Dad sits down at the top of the table, and we sit on each side of him. "Well, come on then. Eat!" dad says and laughs. Everyone starts eating, filling their stomachs with delicious food.

After dinner, everybody sits around in the living room, drinking coffee. I hate a lot of these people, because they're mostly our old neighbours. We lived in the fancy area of District 1 before we moved to my house in the Victors Village, so they're all ignorant snobs. Cashmere seems to love them, though. They practically shower her in gifts and worship her. Just like they did to me last year.

I decide to go for a walk in the woods. I make up some excuse and go into the hallway to put my shoes on. I start jogging up a small, muddy road. I keep going for about 30 minutes before I slow down. I look around at the trees on the side of the road, when I suddenly notice the small path to Darias 'hiding place'. It's an opening in the middle of all the trees, and you'd never notice the path on the side of the road if you don't know about it. I jog up the path and as I get to the opening between the trees I see a shadow. I quickly realize it's Daria. She hears me coming and turns around. We stare into each others eyes. She's been crying. She's still hurt. I hate seeing her cry no matter how much I wanna pretend to ignore her. Suddenly, she starts running, trying to get past me.

As if it was automatically, I put my arm out and catch her, letting my body turn after her so I can put my other arm around her. This isn't the first time something like this has happened. When Daria doesn't want to talk about something, she runs away, literally. She doesn't like to face her problems.

I turn her body around in my arms and look down at her. "Please don't cry, Daria.". I really hate this. I'm supposed to stay away from her, but I can't.

She starts sobbing and puts her face close to my chest, letting her hands rest on her sides.

We just stand like that, for a long time. Eventually, Daria gets tired of standing. "Can we sit down?" she whispers. I sit down, leaning my back to a tree. She sits next to me, looking down at the ground.

We used to sit here all the time before. Suddenly – almost on reflex - I just lean over and kiss her. For a few seconds she kisses me back, but then she – tries to anyway – hit me. She might not have any muscles, but I notice it a little. I pull away from her. "Sorry... that usually helps." I say and look at her. She slaps my face before she looks down again and turn her head away. I actually felt that slap pretty good on my cheek, not .

"Well..." she says, breathing heavily, like she's trying to hold her anger back. "Maybe you shouldn't be such an idiot then!" she says through bitten teeth.

I look down, smiling a little, only because it's nice to see her let her feelings out again. And it's not like she can physically hurt me, so I'm not scared she'll hit me.

"I know it's not a nice situation... but" I say, as she breaks me off in the middle of the sentence.

"Not a nice situation? You broke up with me, and didn't even bother to give me an explanation. You're just so... stupid!" she says angrily, still looking down.

I feel I should protest, but I just sigh and look down. "Yeah, I know. But I can explain it to you if you want."

"Explain then." she snaps back.

I smile a little and look at her. "Well," I start off. I never actually planned on telling her, so I don't really know how to say it. So I just decide not to say it.


End file.
